Son of 9/11 victim details horrifying upbringing, offers hope in new memoir

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    YORK, PA (WPMT) — 19 years ago today, nearly 3,000 people were killed when terrorists attacked our country. Every year we pause to remember the victims and honor the families who were left behind. Now, one of the victim’s greatest legacies is speaking out about losing his dad when he was just 9 years old that horrific September day.

“The superintendent came into our classroom and started whispering to my teacher,” said Matthew John Bocchi as he recalled that day. They came back and pulled him out of class to tell them that a plane had hit One World Trade Center, where Matt’s father John Bocchi worked at Cantor Fitzgerald on the 105th floor. “They’re evacuating the building, it’s okay, there’s nothing to be worried about, they’re safe,” they told him. He remembers going home after school that day and knowing something was wrong when he walked in the door and saw so many family members. And that’s when he learned.

“He had made a few phone calls and said goodbye essentially, and that’s all i knew,” Matt said. The first call was to his wife, Michele and the second to his brother. “He said John, get out, and he just said Tony, I love you.. And that was that,” he said.

September 11th, 2001 came to an end without John Bocchi, the father of 4 little ones, coming home.

“As each day went by, you could sort of see the little glimmers of hope start to dissipate. Pretty much right away I was searching for unequivocal answers because I had no idea what happened to him”, Matt said. Did he jump? Was he stuck in the stairwell? What were his final moments? Matt’s curiosity turned into obsession, researching tapes and pictures. That’s when an uncle through marriage stepped in, Matt assumed, to offer his help. He was wrong.

“He started preying on my vulnerabilities and I was lured into this dark hole with this man and he exploited my inquisitiveness and took advantage of me,” he said about the sexual abuse.

“I was just filled with so much shame and guilt and embarrassment and so it just made things worse for me. If there was any hope of having a normal childhood or any sort of childhood innocence, it was completely stripped away,” Matt said. Before he knew it, he had spiraled out of control, spending time in and out of rehab and contemplating suicide. “For years I was in a state of deep, dark despair, and I thought I’d probably never get out of it,” he said.

Until he finally did, for his dad.

“I’ve come to terms with his death. I know I will never be able to see what happened inside that tower. I will never be able to see his final moments, but I know enough to know that he lived a good life and that’s how he would want to be remembered,” Matt said proudly.

Getting to that place, though, involved a lot of soul-searching and hard work.

“I take it one day at a time and it’s literally all I can do. Some days are better than others but I know that by doing the next right thing I’m living my life in a fulfilled way, the way my dad would want me to live it,” he said.

Now, 5 years sober, Matt is focused on the release of his memoir “Sway,” hoping his story and brutal honesty will help others going through difficult times.

“You can go through traumas, you can go through life changing events but they don’t have to be life changing events and they don’t have to define you. I want to show them that there is hope to be found. There is light at the end of the tunnel.”

Most importantly, his memoir offers the world this important reminder: No matter how far you fall, you can always rebuild.

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